Comedy Writing Prompts

You are a monster hunter, but unlike your colleagues you do not hunt them for glory, revenge or trophies. You hunt them because you made it your personal mission to eat at least one of every monster. Today you attempt your most anticipated kill.

Most Princesses and Princes have fairy godmothers to protect them and provide them with magic boons and powers. Your parents never told you about your fairy godmother until the day a tribe of goblins came collectively calling themselves your "gob"mother

When you were a child, you accidentally wrote a letter to Satan instead of Santa. Now, every year for christmas you get presents from the lord of hell himself.

On a random day everyone is given a super power based on what they were doing in that moment, people who were reaching for something can now stretch like elastic, people who were running now have super speed. You really wish you were doing something else when it happened...

A noble frustrated with the current system, but too weak to revolt, has staked it all on starting a new trend: showing off how wealthy, well-fed and happy their local peasants are.

As a young witch, you have recently made a deal with a devil. In return for power, you must become his servant, the concept of which greatly excites you. At the end of your 5 years, you find that by “servant”, he didn’t mean an agent of justice who torments sinners, he simply needed a maid.

Genies are just customer service reps. State your wish with respect for their intelligence, honour, and time, and they'll do their best to get you what you want. Try to be a lawyer and close every loophole and ambiguity, and they'll bring down the hammer of malicious compliance on you.

It turns out that the entire feline family was created by aliens to eventually wipe out humanity, for them, but clearly something went wrong.

"Earth Ambassador, as Chairman of the Interstellar Mammalian Compact I must insist that you stop loudly expressing your opinion that envoys from the Aquatic Species delegation are 'acting fishy'."

Vampires are real and have lived publicly in society for decades, but they're still played by humans in movies because real vampires don't show up on camera. A director who prides himself on authenticity has a vampire on set to make sure the actors are portraying vampires correctly.

As it turns out, entropy is considered to be the #1 universal threat by the Galactic Council, and are furious when they learn just how much humans contribute to it on purpose to "stay warm"

Due to rising tensions, humanity and the alien empire have decided to make peace with a political marriage between a prince and princess of the two species. The empire isn't aware that mankind doesn't have a singular prince, but the world will pretend, so you're picked to marry god-knows-what.

"You mages could never even begin to understand the wonders of technology-" "I cast Reverse Engineering."

You have just been hired as the janitor at an academy of magic. This is of course the most prestigious role in the entire academy. As you are required to have extensive knowledge on everything magical in order to handle any contaminants, mutants, demons, etc.

The most demoralizing pre-battle motivational speech ever.

You are an angel, angels have only one rule when a human calls your help you must come. One day a human called you to come into the room of a teenage boy to fight the "gay evil" from his closet. So you go, what happens next none of you expected:

An order of magicians attempts to summon a child hero with a pure heart to save their world from evil forces. They instead get his 40-something-year old dad, with a shotgun.

It's the apocalypse, and the world has gone to absolute hell. You are one of the few humans left alive and are scaveching for food when you stumble across a waffle house, full functioning and open.

“Uh, I’m a vampire. I bit you, and drank some of your blood, which means you should be under my control.” “Hahaha, you fool. I am Fae, which means that, technically, you ate some Fae food, and therefore should be under MY control.” “Alright, fine, how do you want to settle this?”

Each sinner has their own personal hell, based around their sins, their failings and their fears. However, due to a divine mix up, you're now in someone else's personal hell, and need to pretend you're being tormented so no-one finds out.

"You are what you eat" has become literal. Many would rather succumb to becoming a chicken or pig than turn into a beetroot or zucchini.

You are an officer in charge of paying off bounty hunters. One day a hunter came in, asking for reward. You looked at what the hunter brought in and shook your head. “Nope. It says right here, wanted…dead or alive. Can’t pay you if you don’t fulfill the conditions.”

A alien empire is currently trying to figure out how a primitive ship managed to destroy their finest battleship. In turn, the human space pirates are trying to figure out why this random ship had such a piss poor hull and why it was trying to attack them with such horrible lazer weaponry.

You kidnapped a princess, because your dragon daughter wanted a princess. You are not sure why exactly she wanted one but you got her one.

A failed author accidentally summons a demon into their house. Instead of wanting their soul, the demon shyly requests a signed copy of the only book they've ever written. As it turns out, this demon is a huge fan of their work- and he's not the only one.

In an attempt to modernize, Hell remakes the 9 circles. You are in charge of the circle dedicated to people needlessly cruel to service industry workers.

"Foolish hero. As long as there is evil-" "-Yeah, yeah, you'll return. But why? Each time you show up, you get your teeth kicked in."

You're Captain Obvious! The hero with an ability that's considered useless as you only state the obvious..... At least it was considered useless until people realized that what may be obvious to others may not be to them. Now you have your own talk show.

"You see, hero from another world, our land is governed by a form of arachno-communism" "You mean anarcho-communism" "No"

Write a shitty Mary Sue story, but from the perspective of an irritated side character.